What's Mine is Yours, What's Yours is Yours? Que?

PRENUPTUAL AGREEMENT will always be a debatable topic. My thoughts about the matter are conflicted. As a younger adult, when I had less business sense and I was more rambunctious, I was totally against it. I've always been an advocate for the institution of marriage. I hate divorce and don't believe in it. In following the law of attraction, I thought that if a guy spoke to his potential wife about pre-nups, he would be attracting this force into his relationship. Its almost like you now know or think its OK to get divorced because the other half of your team has already accepted the possibility of it. The thought of pre-nups didn't work for me because I wouldn't want my wife to even consider the option. "Till death do us part babe, sorry".

Fast forward to present day and you tell yourself "chit was all good just a week ago". Things have changed. Forget about the "Hollywood marriages" that only delusional people believe are matches made in heaven. But with television and the influx of reality shows, marriage is hardly a glimpse of what it used to be, even to regular people. This Hollywood disease has crossed state lines and the acceptance of divorce has spread like a forest fire. Not long ago, our grandparents had as many issues as we do, but divorce was hardly ever an option. They worked through it and even if they didn't, they accepted the reality whether they were happy or not. Everyone knew granny and grandpa had issues but it was what it was. Imagine grandpa paying child support or alimony in the 60s and 70s. I'm sure it happened, but without doing research, I'm sure it was rare.

As I scour the earth for my soul mate, I wonder will I really know if she's official, because there has to be two levels of "soulmatism". The first level is the soul mate that is eternally yours. The second level is the soul mate that takes half for eternity. We don't know as many first level soul mates, but we know a lot of second level soul mates where one of them has more than life insurance taken out of their checks before its taxed. In "Think Big and Kick Ass", Donald Trump calls these soul mates stupid because they are willing to lose everything for love (or lust in my opinion). He gave an example of an associate that made the mistake of not getting a pre-nup not once, but several times. To me, one is only stupid if this person lacks knowledge. This guy seems crazy. Hopeless romantic I guess.

So you see, I'm torn. Even as I read up and down editing, I change my mind several times. I'm arrogant enough to think I can solve any problem. But I'm calculated enough to know that the odds are not in my favor. OK, I've made a decision. I guess because I'm crazy and not stupid, No pre-nup. I repeat, NO PRE-NUP, but she better say yes before I start making eight figures.

"Spike and I Courtside at the Movies"

I have to admit, I couldn’t wait to type my next blog post. With all the positive feedback, I was getting extremely anxious to answer another serious question from the female race. Actually, I had the next post waiting with the only thing left for me to do is click ‘publish’. But with the timing, I decided to go another direction. Nice weather on an Easter Sunday, why not go to the movies? Why not capitalize on this opportunity to talk my chit?

I will begin with saying Congratulations to Tyler Perry on his successful opening weekend for ‘Why Did I Get Married Too’. Approximately 29.2 million viewers wanted to know how the cast of characters’ lives have changed in the three years since ‘Why Did I Get Married’. Unfortunately, why did I get married is not the question, why did I pay money to go see why did I get married is the question. I will admit that I am not a Tyler Perry movie fan, but I convinced myself to go into the theater with an open mind. I said “Stevie, watch the movie as if you don’t know that the actors will overact; as if you don’t know that the script will be underwritten”. I told myself this. I really wanted to be in the “in” crowd for once and actually agree with everyone. I mean 29.2, even if only 20 million enjoyed the movie its still a success. So people when you read the rest of this post, you should at least know I tried very hard to look the other way and ignore some of the obvious blunders.

There were some entertaining segments throughout the movie. But, I often asked myself, “What’s the purpose”? Perfect example is Angela (Tasha Smith). Angela is too much. Talk about beating a dead horse. Ok, we get it, she’s loud, she’s ghetto, she’s annoying, but why? Does Tyler Perry think he needs to have this ignorant behavior to keep the audience interested? Is it that important that he provides a character that he thinks we can relate to? Was the rant in the television studio really necessary? She already had the rant in the airport, the rants in the “cabana”, and the rant on the beach to name a few. She’s supposed to be an educated woman; a mother and entrepreneur in her mid-30s. I’m just not buying it.

Patricia’s (Janet Jackson) behavior towards Gavin (Malik Yoba) is confusing. I’m sorry, but I need clarification. Isn’t this marriage retreat the good doctor’s idea? I don’t know, I am a bit slow on the weekends sometimes so maybe someone can enlighten me on what appears to be a desperate attempt to make these two boring characters interesting.

The Rock, seriously? The funny cake, you kidding me? Did people really think that was funny?

The hospital scene. Come on, don’t insult my intelligence. That was so cheesy. And how can Patricia have credibility with her friends when they know she destroyed her own marriage. Does Terry (Tyler Perry) really forget about what his wife has done and forgive her simply because Patricia’s crying and feeling guilty.

Sheila (Jill Scott) and Troy (Lamman Rucker). When I first thought about it, I decided not to go in. Obviously I changed my mind. Twice. Sorry, even I battle myself at times. I’ll leave it alone. You guys can fill in the blanks.

The car accident. Tyler, are you trying to distract us from knowing that you didn’t know how to end the movie.

We went on a lot of rides watching this movie, but we ended up at no destination. The amount of lack of closure is so high you damn near want to think this was a scary movie that has rumors that the sequel has already been shot starring new cast members Denzel Washington and Will Smith. If he’s trying to get me to come back and pay to see ‘Why Did I Get Married Again After I Know I Shouldn’t Have Got Married The First Two Times’, he can forget it. Tyler you can reach me at swild21@gmail.com, please hurry up and e-mail me the answers so I can satisfy my fading curiosity.

Sometimes there are comedies that can get away with having laughter and not having a story. This is not one of those times. There are a lot of unnecessary “drama” filled scenes. There is no finality. And I have to keep it real, the ending sucked!

The other day one of my friends said “I was of the elite crowd who has never seen a Tyler Perry movie, can’t say that anymore. But it’s sad that the first thing I said when I left the theater was ‘typical’……”

I wonder what number in 29,200,000 was Spike’s number this past weekend.