Unless you’ve been under a rock the last two weeks, you’re very aware of the year’s biggest story in sports. For whatever reason, a lot of people are very upset. But for those of you that are upset because a couple players decided to join up and show their unselfishness, be careful, it’s a slippery slope. Do we really want to promote individuality to the point where we are shunning teamwork? I think most people disagreed with the move and everyone has something to say. Even Jordan gave his double penny. And although he said this was something he, Magic or Bird would never do, he clearly stated that these are different times.
I agree; these are different times, and in more than just the world of basketball. These are different times in the world of dating. Evidence of these different times can be spotted at any lounge, house warming, or cookout. Next time you’re out, do like I do, sit back, have a drink and observe. Although I do it for comedy most of the time, there are occasional moments where I learn a few things. The same way LBJ teamed up with D-Wade, I’ve observed that guys are no longer as competitive in trying to get THE girl. Some guys have tucked their pride away and decided to take the back seat. You have to respect this arrangement. You have to respect this guy. Ladies and Gentlemen, I would like to introduce you to the Wingman.
A true Wingman knows his role. A true Wingman respects his role for numerous reasons. First of all, he knows that he can be the key ingredient to his main man’s success which will result in them being stronger as a team. He also knows that there will be days where he is the main man and he expects the same courtesy. No guy wants to continuously be Duck in the ‘shy-brother’ routine.
I’m assuming that the men reading this know the role of the Wingman, so for those of you women who still have no clue what I’m referring to, please allow me to explain. The Wingman is the distraction when your girlfriend is minding someone else’s business, ie yours; he’s the 4th wheel when the girlfriend just has to tag along on the date; the ice-breaker for the friend that cant get his lines out; the rescue team when the girlfriend is ready to leave; the cock-block kryptonite when the angry black woman of the crew doesn’t want anyone to get any because she cant get any; the tension easer when things seem like they are about to get out of control; he is the ultimate utility man. Ladies, I hope you like and appreciate the Wingman, because you created him.
No matter how confident a guy is, whenever he sees a group of women (2 or more) and he’s attracted to one of them, he considers the use of a Wingman. Although he may be successful without one, he knows the Wingman’s services increase his chance of success. I’ve gotten plenty of calls saying “Yo, I coulda used a Wingman last night”. Once a guy hears this, he can pretty much predict the story he’s about to hear. Hunting for a woman has risen to a new, higher level. Not only does he have to convince the hunted that he is the one, but he also has to convince 1, 2, or 3 other friends of his prowess. Ladies, I already know what you are thinking or saying. You’re shaking your head, waving your finger saying, “a real man will do what he has to do to get the girl”. Boooooooo. Get out of my face. This is one of the reasons that single people that want relationships are still single. Imagine if guys stood in the way of a girl trying to get his man. Exactly.
Ladies, on behalf of the frustrated men that don’t have Wingmen readily available, I am waiving the white flag. We don’t know why some of you hate or allow your girls to hate, but will you guys consider a moratorium for the rest of the summer? Wingmen have been working hard lately, we need a vacation. Sign below if you support the ‘Wingmen Need a Break’ movement.
I agree; these are different times, and in more than just the world of basketball. These are different times in the world of dating. Evidence of these different times can be spotted at any lounge, house warming, or cookout. Next time you’re out, do like I do, sit back, have a drink and observe. Although I do it for comedy most of the time, there are occasional moments where I learn a few things. The same way LBJ teamed up with D-Wade, I’ve observed that guys are no longer as competitive in trying to get THE girl. Some guys have tucked their pride away and decided to take the back seat. You have to respect this arrangement. You have to respect this guy. Ladies and Gentlemen, I would like to introduce you to the Wingman.
A true Wingman knows his role. A true Wingman respects his role for numerous reasons. First of all, he knows that he can be the key ingredient to his main man’s success which will result in them being stronger as a team. He also knows that there will be days where he is the main man and he expects the same courtesy. No guy wants to continuously be Duck in the ‘shy-brother’ routine.
I’m assuming that the men reading this know the role of the Wingman, so for those of you women who still have no clue what I’m referring to, please allow me to explain. The Wingman is the distraction when your girlfriend is minding someone else’s business, ie yours; he’s the 4th wheel when the girlfriend just has to tag along on the date; the ice-breaker for the friend that cant get his lines out; the rescue team when the girlfriend is ready to leave; the cock-block kryptonite when the angry black woman of the crew doesn’t want anyone to get any because she cant get any; the tension easer when things seem like they are about to get out of control; he is the ultimate utility man. Ladies, I hope you like and appreciate the Wingman, because you created him.
No matter how confident a guy is, whenever he sees a group of women (2 or more) and he’s attracted to one of them, he considers the use of a Wingman. Although he may be successful without one, he knows the Wingman’s services increase his chance of success. I’ve gotten plenty of calls saying “Yo, I coulda used a Wingman last night”. Once a guy hears this, he can pretty much predict the story he’s about to hear. Hunting for a woman has risen to a new, higher level. Not only does he have to convince the hunted that he is the one, but he also has to convince 1, 2, or 3 other friends of his prowess. Ladies, I already know what you are thinking or saying. You’re shaking your head, waving your finger saying, “a real man will do what he has to do to get the girl”. Boooooooo. Get out of my face. This is one of the reasons that single people that want relationships are still single. Imagine if guys stood in the way of a girl trying to get his man. Exactly.
Ladies, on behalf of the frustrated men that don’t have Wingmen readily available, I am waiving the white flag. We don’t know why some of you hate or allow your girls to hate, but will you guys consider a moratorium for the rest of the summer? Wingmen have been working hard lately, we need a vacation. Sign below if you support the ‘Wingmen Need a Break’ movement.
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Thank you my brother as I am self titled "World Greatest Wingman", I think we should be saluted and yes, our purpose explained to woman.
ReplyDeleteTo the fellas:
If I may dig a little deeper,ahem. A lot of men are haters filled with jealously and insecurity. You know the guy that looks the other guy up and down to see what the competition is working with. These guys are the last ones you want on your side. As ES said, "some guys have tucked their pride away and decided to take the back seat." This is key in having a successful wingman. Every night isn't going to be your night, so if you man has the hot hand, hold him down. I have successfully winged and kept the most hideous women "entertained" for the sake of my boy. All the way from the fat to the just plain bad on the eyes and done it with a smile. I even held down a total stranger in a bar after seeing the girl who he was pursuing, girlfriend PHYSICALLY try and pull her from this young man. I jumped in and struck up a convo with the, of course unattractive friend who was just probably mad her better looking friend was getting love. The guy got the digits and I got a warm "good lookin", pound, hug and beer from the grateful fella. His boys that were there got an earful from us both about being a wingman and they both said, "she was too ugly (their words not mines) to even wing." Put the pride aside guys and take one for the team so your boy can live the dream.
To the ladies:
Your girl is a big girl. If she isn't interested, she will say "no thank you", "I have a boyfriend" or any other creative line to get out of the line of fire. She, nor we, don't need you to tell her with sass and attitude, "c'mon", "let's go", "hurry up" or stand there sulking and sighing like a bored 7 year old at their grandma's Bingo game. You women, and you know who you are, are HATERS. Yes, I said it HATERS. The day hasn't gone your way and you been putting your outfit together since the night before and you were up at 7am to get to the dominicans for that wash and set. But, your prince charming hasn't holla'd yet. All you got all day was, "sup ma" from the guy you say has no swag yet your girl has been approached by Essence magazines most eligible bachelors all day long. You don't want to admit it, but you're a tad salty and if you can't have him, nobody can! Here is a word to the wise. We, men, pick up on that behavior and your stock plummets. If you were being sized up for the kill, by someone outside the circle looking in on your friend getting holla's at, the chance of someone stepping to you now drops dramatically. You're coined, "the hater friend", "the one with the attitude." Your poison and the sole purpose for someone wanted you now is to "conquer the dragon", to teach you a lesson on sportsmanship, to essentially sh*t on you. Sad, but true.
There is no "I" in team and every great person in history had their counterpart. Jordan had Pippen, Kobe had Shaq, Ashford had Simpson, Dr. Evil had #2. There is no dishonor in being #2. The house is beautiful, but can't stand without a foundation.
In conclusion, the moral of the story and for both sexes: "Celebrate the win with your teammate."
Great Post again Este! lol
ReplyDeletebut sometimes... just sometimes... you dudes wait ALL NIGHT and take too long to approach a female. you build up the courage... JUST AS WE ARE GETTING UP AND READY TO GO! lol
I've been the female on both sides of this "game" I've been rude to the wingman sometimes b/c really.. dude, I don't need you to entertain me, just tell your boy to speed up his game and lets go! But real "big girls" don't have to wait any longer, we simply say, "girl, you go ahead and stay, i'll speak to you later"
I've learned to not be rude b/c now i'm getting it, everyone has a position...but what you guys may be underestimating is the "gate keeper" maybe is playing her pre-determined position, maybe you missed a hand signal and maybe the "stallion" you're talking to doesn't like to say "no thank you" and wants to APPEAR to be interested so she waits for HER WING WOMAN to play her role which is operation, get that out my face! lol
Just saying.
but for the record, I no longer stop anyone's game and have all my game players on board. lol
"The Wingman is the distraction when your girlfriend is minding someone else’s business, ie yours; he’s the 4th wheel when the girlfriend just has to tag along on the date; the ice-breaker for the friend that cant get his lines out; the rescue team when the girlfriend is ready to leave;..."
ReplyDeleteSad as it may seem, many men dont realize that the "wingman" does him more harm than good at times. The "wingman" stands out to the intelligent female, who is deciding exactly who the Alpha male is in the situation. Unfortunately, my experience has been that only mediocre men use "wingmen" like these. Less than attractive/confident men dont even have the courage to be a part of the "attack" (totally used in humor, not literally) and the real catches will usually have another gentleman (or a few, depending on the size of his pack) there solely to give my company some eye candy. However, every situation is different. Either way, the man who displays more control of the situation/setting will have his pick. So, "wingmen" play your position. Be mindful that a sidekicks strengths might divert the desired woman's attention from their boy, to them instead. "Wingmen": If you are there to help, do that. All others, choose your "wingman" wisely. He has to appear less attractive to your target than you.
In defense of some of my girlfriends:
Many men do not realize that women often look to their friends for help with weeding out the... uh... weeds. Lol. In a bar setting the drinks are flowing, women are feeling sexy, carefree, etc. We sometimes bring girlfriends with us who we trust to help us NOT make a mistake. "Mistake" as in giving the wrong guy a legit shot and a chance to use flattery to mindf*** her. The music is loud, she might be tipsy and fall for your "charm" more easily than she usually would. As embarrassed as I am, its true. Not for all, but for many. My girl isnt a hater, she's a second opinion.
ES WILD, it seems you have this matter down to a science. Interesting and well-written Post!
Very well said Samantha. I see you are either intelligent, observant or have brothers. For arguments sake, I'll say intelligent. Although your statement may have some validity, two words can refute that theory, MAN. LAW.
ReplyDeleteMan Law #428 states, "Wingman will play a supporting role as not to divert attention from pursued woman on to himself, but only aid in removing gatekeeper."
Men don't carry wingmen with them like condoms, but in a social setting we know which one of our boys can PROPERLY run interference on the gatekeeper. Properly as is removing the gatekeeper completely out of the picture, so our boy can do work. Now as the oh so lovely Pabvon stated, said "gatekeeper maybe is playing her predetermined role", but whether she is the buffer or not, a good wingman will distract and keep conversation #1 separate from wingman vs gatekeeper convo. That there leaves rooms for a one on one good old gunfight. Once the gatekeeper is removed the woman has two choices: fight or flight. If she fights, its a battle of the wits, charm and swag. You may get the number or she may ask for yours. If she asks for your number, 97% of the time she aint calling. And asking for email address is just a slap in the face. If she flies, she just aint into you brother, OPERATION BUS STOP: another one will be by in 8 minutes, don't fret.
Fair rebuttal The Mighty D.R.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad to see that SOME men exercise good judgement when choosing their right-hand. Teach a class. Maybe then men would be more successful at their pursuits.
However, there are two things that you said that I believe should be addressed in defense of females. And, sadly, I believe your thoughts are shared by the majority of men.
First being: the gunfight. In an ideal world, women and men WOULD use wit, charm, and swag. However, everyday when a woman leaves her home and goes out into the world, its more like a battle out of the Dark Ages, than a friendly game of chess. You say wit, charm, and swag. I say its more the use of manipulation towards the other's emotions and insecurities to quench selfish and egoistic needs and desires. Both sexes are guilty of this at times.
Secondly... (grinning)
"OPERATION BUS STOP" is the most faulty and lame excuse for encouragement ever. Sorry, fellas! The Mighty D.R, your attempt at a pat on the back was weak. If you find a woman you want (whatever "want" implies to you) and she isnt responding, YOU did something wrong. True players know this. Let me make something clear: Any man can have any single, heterosexual woman woman he wants-Period. Only fools hunt and expect to come home with game without watching and reading their prey. If you failed, the odds are that you screwed up somewhere.
... And, only to the individual with no actual taste or legitimate preference are people like buses. I'll be waving as I ride past you "bus-riders" in a luxury car... and, furthermore, a different one as often as i feel the need. NO bus competes with that.
Just food for thought. In participating in this blog, i've found a meal. Thank you ES, Pabvon, and The Mighty D.R.
Yup, intelligent you are Samantha. Let me touch on a few of your points.
ReplyDeleteYou said, "The use of manipulation towards the other's emotions and insecurities to quench selfish and egoistic needs and desires." To me this reads "games." Playing with peoples emotions and insecurities is just wrong and recipe for disaster ie: tire slashed, keyed car or in front of your job with golf club in hand. I steer clear of that type of political posturing. Honesty is the best policy and if being honest doesn't get me anywhere, at least i'll have a clear conscience.
Secondly, "Any man can have any single, heterosexual woman woman he wants-Period." Sound GREAT, but you know and I know that's just not true. Yes, we can talk ourselves "out of the p***y", but if a woman is not attracted to you, you can forget it. If that was the case, there wouldn't be as many single woman out here. As far as Operation Bus Stop goes, there are some guys who strike out, or for your sake, "do something wrong" during the courting process, get rejected and their night is done for.
Good female insight for those who carry one bullet in their gun. Luxury cars are nice, but I pack an uzi in my lambo ;)