“Dear Summer, I know you gon’ miss me, for we been together like Nike Airs and crisp tees….” If you know the words to this Jay-Z song, feel free to sing along. As I sing, I reflect on Labor Day and what it represents. No, I’m not talking about a yearly national tribute to the contributions workers have made to the strength, prosperity, and well-being of our country. Nor am I talking about the temporary extinction of our beloved white outfits. But these things all have something in common; they signify the end of summer. Technically, summer ends with the Autumnal Equinox which is September 21st, but for all inclusive purposes, most will say farewell to the cookouts, farewell to the pool parties, and possibly farewell to the summer love affairs.
Yeah, I meant to say affairs as in plural. If they weren’t affairs, they were hook-ups, introductions, hang-outs, dates, interactions, flings, or luckily or unluckily, one-night stands. Summer represents opportunities. It represents new experiences. All the people that hibernate for the other three seasons decide to come out and play. People travel from far to see new places. People meet new faces and get reacquainted with old faces. I hope everyone enjoyed their summer, because fall is here.
Ladies, on May 26th, in my post “2nd Place is the 1st Loser” I gave you some advice. I advised you to reserve your spot with that special person before summer grabbed his attention away from you. Some of you did (you’ve been providing me with updates) and some of you didn’t, you decided to stay on the market (you guys provided me with those updates as well, lol). Now that fall is amongst us, some decisions have to be made. So, instead of becoming nostalgic, let’s focus on the possibilities of the upcoming season.
Decisions, decisions, decisions. For the fall, most people try simplifying life. They try to slow things down. Start hitting the gym hard preparing for the spring and next summer. Start saving money for the winter holidays. And of course, lets not forget, they start narrowing down their “team”. Some are either taking it to the next level with the one that they locked down before summer, or some are thinking about the ones they met over the summer. Ladies its OK to look through the pictures and read the old text messages to confirm if your fall/ winter love is in proximity. If there is a potential love interest, pursuing him now may have good results. Men and women are usually on the same page this time of year. Guys are more susceptible during the fall. No one really wants to be alone. Ladies, get your pheromones out and unleash them. If you’re strategic enough to work yourself into his NBA, NFL, NCAA football and basketball schedule, you may have won yourself a husband. If you choose wisely, by the time spring gets here, you will no longer have to hate on everyone that is boasting about “love being in the air”. You’ll be the one getting hated on this time. When summer 2011 hits, you’re weekends are spent with your significant other.
Some people’s summer was too good; so good that they didn’t have enough time to focus on anyone longer than two minutes. Then there is the bad summer, didn’t meet anyone worth two minutes. Don’t be alarmed if you didn’t find that special person. You have three choices: you can hit up events for the next month as if it was the let out at the club, you cant dust off some of the numbers in your phone and try to develop something with one of those under appreciated former flings that may not be special but was pretty fun, or you warm yourself up during the cold months, I hear snuggies are very efficient.
*The Mighty DR contributed to this post.
Posts
Very nicely put if I must say so myself.
ReplyDeleteTS
I agree sadly...:(
ReplyDeleteI could be wrong, but I think they got snuggies for two now, so that's even more incentive to try to snatch something up before the temperature really goes south for the winter. That, or stop at Costco on ya way home and get you an industrial size box of Swiss Miss hot chocolate.......and the 50-pack of batteries....
ReplyDeleteLOL...well, what you are talking about, us ladies like to call it, In Search of "The Winter Boo" or getting "Boo-ed Up" for the winter. A lot of us women already know the cycle, so those of us who pay attention can save ourselves before the other shoe drops.
ReplyDeleteI'm talking about how after a long summer of males "Female Frolicking", they realize, "oh shoot! Winter is coming. Who's going to cook for me, who's going to provide a warm body for me to cuddle with, to have a lap to put my head in, and of course, to sex me?"
So, ladies, then all of a sudden those dudes who went M.I.A. around May, (some as far back as the day before Valentine's Day), start calling on average like August 30th...maybe a little sooner, to start locking down that "Winter Boo".
Now, ladies, if you're good with being a Winter Boo...if you're good with having been put on the back burner during one of the most fun seasons only to be called during the season when there isn't much else to do but be cozied in the house, then you're good. But ladies, if you already know the cycle of how these some of these guys bounce in and out at their discretion to allow them to get multiple-tail in the summer and focused-tail in the winter and you know you want more than that...then don't fall or continue to fall for the trap.
I know I'm worth more than seasonal love, so I say no to being a "Winter Boo"
So I guess @ Miss Understood you will be stopping at Costco as Deez suggested for that industrial size box of Swiss Miss hot chocolate and 50 pack of batteries. LMFAO
ReplyDeleteSeriously though, I commend you on refusing to fall into "Winter Boo" status, but lets not act like you women don't do it either. Being that women are crafty and the pu**y yields way more power than you think, lets not pretend you don't have what I like to call the "Fall Guy." Not Fall as in Autumn, but Fall as in "if all else fails." When I'm in in need, I know "Joe" will take me to eat ON HIM, to the movies ON HIM, to a play ON HIM. You know Joe likes you, but you are not interested in him "like that", but you're interested enough for him to swipe that debit card at your favorite Italian spot when you're hungry.
Now, you're probably saying "uh uh, not me!" Fine, maybe not you, but you definitely have girls who rock like that. So y'all have your "Fall Guys" and we have our "Winter Boo's." But lets not pretend for a minute you don't want some companionship on a blustery evening and I'm not talking about Joe. I'm talking about Sweet Back! Someone that's gonna knock the stuffin off that english muffin. #dontfrontforme
Very original post!
ReplyDeleteWhen time is running out in a big game, who gets minutes? The best, most consistant, highest point averaging players. And the Fall/Winter are the Playoffs in terms of dating.
Personally, I've never used a "Fall Guy" or considered myself to be a "Winter Boo", but there are worse positions you can be in. During the summer, we have more time to entertain potential hook-ups, flings, etc. As Fall approaches, schedules become more restricted and, naturally we have to make some adjustments so our needs are met. If a man has 10 women on the rotation, he's now going to have to narrow that down to the BEST three (best as in most gratifying). Maybe two regulars who are comparable to each other in performance (who he might actually like), and another one or two (who he takes less seriously, but sort of likes a little) to add some variety. Yes, his interest will be a mix of superficial and genuine, but it's interest no less. There's something about you that made him/her decide you were worth some Fall/Winter time.
Because humans are evolving (even if only subconsciously) all the time, dynamics of his/her interests are subject to change as you're getting time. No matter what, it could always be spent with someone else. If you made the cut, be glad and raise your glass like they do at the end of the For the Love of Ray J shows (Lmao!!!).
The Winter brings alot of time for snuggling, talking, and warm, comforting sex. If this isnt a good position to be in with a man/woman you like, I'm not sure what is. Time to show and prove. You get closer to someone during this time. People who reject the "Fall Guy"/"Winter Boo" idea may secretly be afraid of rejection.
There are particular moments during a courting/smashing that define it. You never know when a look/word/touch/action will be what brings you closer together, or will be the moment makes you decide never to see him/her again. "Winter Boo's" and "Fall Guys" be grateful that, during the colder seasons, you are getting another chance.
Its not the end of the world, but understandably, not necessarily the beginning either. If you LIKE someone, go with the flow and be their "Winter Boo" or "Fall Guy". Best case, you end up with something more. Worst case, you are sexually gratified and have someone awesome to keep you company when it's cold out. Everyone has had a semi-casual or casual situation surprise them and turn out to be something significant. Reject this concept and you will only leave room for someone else's attempt. If thats cool with you, fine. However, be aware that the "Winter Boo" or "Fall Guy" might make it past January and all the way until Valentine's Day. After Valentine's Day, people are feeling pleasant and the weather's warming up and that "Boo" is STILL around and getting treated even BETTER. Then a few birthdays pass and its now Summer again, and the person who rejected the "Winter Boo" invite, now cant even get a June one night stand. At times, pride gets you nowhere but farther then where you want to be.
To everyone who is seeing the first signs that they may turn into a "Winter Boo", be glad YOU get some!
Samantha,
ReplyDeleteMy baby is back!! Where you been boo? The misguided has been in need of your wisdom and you know I've missed you so :(
Loving you always,
The Mighty D.R.
xoxo
PS - Ladies, listen to Samantha, she's the Phil Jackson of the WNBA.
Very nicely put Samantha. I completely agree! The term "Winter Boo" doesn't sound appealing but it's the opportunity that's important.
ReplyDeleteES didn't say it would only last for a season. He makes references to continuing on through other seasons IF things go right. I think what some women misunderstand is that it's an equal "IF." The guy isn't the only one with a say. The woman gets to decide as well if he's relationship material or just a "Fall Guy."
I view Fall the same way I view Affirmative Action. I don't care if I got the job cause I'm black. Just give me the job! LOL! Keeping the job is the hardest part ladies, so forget which season brought you the job and just focus on keeping it.
Good Stuff Samantha,
ReplyDeleteMy only suggestion is, yes, "go with the flow" but if it's not progressing after a few season cycles it's just time to move along. Get some new players in the rotation and hope for the best with the new "players". I agree with the posts and comments mostly but these things are only able to be applied when you ONLY "LIKE" someone. when "LOVE" comes into play... there are all new strategies... right? *confused face*
Either way... I love reading the posts and comments.
Peace
Sorry for the late post.This post strikes me personally in a way. As I reflect on the summer and all the invites I sent out. How many of june ladies made it to august. I guess in one way you can look at it quite impressive to stay in proximity with a dude or even a lady around the summer time. Realistically its sad for my opposing gender to have to settle for just a winter boo and be a proud member of "cuffin season". Although like my man ES stated that this is a time that you can cherish if you can still be relevant while Lebron is on the heat, Kobe goes for his 3peat. The giants lose another season and for some even baseball is more important then you might find yourself in the spring time within something real. Instead of his memorial brazil,DR, or cancun escapade he just might take that cruise this time around. I think its very important to get someone in the winter some of those tuesday wensday night can get chilly chill for real...excuse the rapping but that's exactly what you need to be wrap and not inside of some damn down comforter from target , we talking a person an unspoken vibe that the winter brings. Shyt if you warm enough he might show up to Thanksgiving at your fam house and that automatically means you at least getting a christmas gift and may get some good good to bring the new year. Which can continue to valentine and that's how a baby made. Lol na I'm playing but the winter boo should be hopeful when its all said in time to settle he will think of you first.!
ReplyDeleteJust thought of something. What if you have a regular rotation? You have winter boos and summer honeys? You know the great fall backs you can ALWAYS rely on some winter bootie from. Cooks cleans keeps you company during those hibernation months. They (because both men and women have them) can go with you to family events because (s)he/s been there a wild long time. As soon as spring rolls around suddenly you need freedom and you start pulling out your phonebook of guys or shorties that look like they stepped out of videos and fashion ads.
ReplyDeleteLol @ Pabvon, sorry, you didn't think of that. Thats usually how it works. We are trying to end the cycle though, or are we not? Who knows? Roll the dice.
ReplyDelete@Pabvon:
ReplyDeleteThats a very sad but, unfortunately, common situation. People who try to create those sort of regular rotations with the same individuals over and over possess false senses of confidence. No one person chooses the other to be their "boo", they choose each other. No matter who is more into the other. I say that to say this: Anytime distance grows between two romantically or sexually involved individuals, especially something trivial like the excitement of a new season, they BOTH risk being replaced.
Each person makes the decision to come back when its their "season". Whether they do so or not is up to them. Both parties should do what feels naturally to them, and both should gain exactly what they are seeking out of it. If some finds themselves unsatisfied with the conditions of the relationship with the other, they should leave or add another to their roster. We all have standby's;-)
@Lady T: @"Equal If": So True! @Affirmative Action comparison: Lmao! :-)
@The Mighty D.R: I've been away working on trades;-) Lmao. XOXO! Your comments restore my faith in the rational male... (mostly) Lol!